Lockdown 2.0, Day 43

 I realised last night that we have completed 6 weeks of lockdown- if we’d stayed on the original Stage 3 plan, today’s the day that restrictions would have eased. Although we have all had our crazy moments this week in particular, I’m impressed that we have got this far and on the whole are pretty happy and mainly getting along. There’s still about 4 weeks left of Stage 4 and who knows what after that, but I’m feeling hopeful and positive about the future.

It was a good day today. Chats with Liam in the morning, a game of Othello with Amelie, work on my photos, number puzzles, watching The Dragon Prince with the girls, sorting out the piles of fabric that have been taking over our lounge room. Liam went for a bike ride, the girls and I went for a long (slow) walk - I’m still sore from my strength training and Caitlin from Cheer training last night. 

At 4.30 we video called with 2 other families for our hot chocolate festival. Liam and 2 of his friends made their hot chocolates and then chatted while they drank them. (We had ordered lots from the Yarra Valley Chocolaterie, they came with melts to put in hot milk, couverture choc to melt and pour in, a flavoured marshmallow and a treat of some sort to make it super special. Liam had a wagon wheel slurp, Caitlin a ginger one, mine was Gatytime themed and Amelie’s chicken shaped marshmallows with a sprinkle covered egg. The girls and I made ours and we FaceTimed with the adults.. After a while one of them had to go, and I kept talking to my other friend while we had a glass of wine together.  The hot chocs were a great experience and the conversation was really fun. 

We had a pork ragù for dinner - made by the chef at de Bortoli - it was amazingly good! We kept watching the Dragon Pronce and I started making something with my t-shirt yarn, then did some of my creativity course and have ended the day feeling very happy and content.

Lockdown 2.0, Day 40

 I felt much better today, more positive about the future and felt happy with where I am right now. Yesterday was the anniversary of my miscarriage so that could well have influenced my mood.

Amelie and I made some designs with a compass and pencil and then played Mr Squiggle for a while. I did some work outside and on the computer and around the kitchen. I had an RACV guy come to look at my car battery because it's been playing up a lot, he thinks it might be fine if I just make sure I start the car every few days... I'm not convinced but if I keep having problems I'll get him to come back and put in a new one. I played the piano, Caitlin crocheted some gorgeous little dinosaurs, Amelie talked to friends and played Roblox, and hung out on the trampoline, Liam talked to friends and played on his computer. Amelie and I had an intense game of Mastermind (well, she guessed correctly in 3 turns, I took a lot longer and it stretched my logical thinking quite a bit), Mum and I played Boggle remotely, then Caitlin and I went for a walk around sunset, coming home pretty much in the dark. Luna is getting really good at staying near us even when we're not holding the lead - as long as we leave the lead attached to her collar. We all watched the Grand Final of Ninja State of Origin - we were so hoping for a Victorian win, but the WA team have several of our favourite ninjas so we weren't too disappointed when they won (and at least Vic was in the final race).

Looks like the weather is going to be a bit unpleasant for the rest of the week - it's already getting really windy outside and I think there's going to be a lot of rain.

Lockdown 2.0, Day 37

 I didn't sleep well (this time I got up and tended the fire, then made some t-shirt yarn.  It was a more interesting way to pass the time than lying in bed trying to get to sleep, and I was pretty relaxed by the time I went back) - but I did feel much better. Today my attitude was much more - well if things are going to be bad in the future, I might as well enjoy the present, spend as much time with the kids as I can, doing things we love, looking after myself and my family - so I got on with being happy in the now, and I had a really good day.

Amelie and I played several rounds of Red 7s - we've played before but she didn't remember it, she really enjoyed it this time. Liam joined us for a while. In the late morning all the kids and I went for a walk. We headed over to Houghtons Lane. It was cloudy but not too cold. My hip was hurting a bit and my back still a little tender, so I turned back soon after we got to the road, and the kids kept going (the girls went all the way to the end, and Amelie climbed the gorgeous big gum tree, Liam came back a bit earlier once he'd had enough). 

A friend rang me in the morning with a computer question then we chatted for a while. After lunch I had a lovely long Facetime call with a a friend who I hadn't talked to in ages - it was great to catch up. Later in the afternoon we had a Zoom call with my sister and her kids - we played cards with my nephew, watched my niece open her birthday present from us, and chatted to my sister for her own birthday. I think I'll try to do that a bit more often. I then had a friend call by the front gate on his way home, to drop off  some groceries that I hadn't been able to get in Healesville or Yarra Glen. Nice to have a brief, in-person contact to round out a very social day by lockdown standards!

Tony brought home lots of parcels from the post office - including some stickers and room decorations that Caitlin had ordered online, a care package for her from a friend, and a big box books from the library for me - very exciting! (Our library is sending out holds to members, and filling the box with other books based on our borrowing history. I got lots of fantasy novels and some historical fiction - most of them books I haven't heard of before so I'm looking forward to exploring them).

We got takeaway pizza and pasta from Yarra Glen and watched more of Avatar: The Last Airbender. I'm really enjoying it - and it's a fairly easy show to just watch bits of, although the kids tell me it's even better when watched in order. After dinner I had my Friday date with myself - I had a big bowl of ice-cream, Baileys and nutella and read my book in my room for an hour. It was quite blissful.

Lockdown 2.0, Day 5

Feeling really happy this afternoon. I had one of my favourite kind of days (apart from days spent with friends). I pottered around the house, sorting and tidying, a bit of cleaning, in between writing, reading, playing games on my phone, watching TV (Brooklyn 9-9) and movies (the 1st 3 Twilight movies) on and off, chatting to the kids and on the phone with friends. I took my time over things, didn't worry about finishing tasks, just did what naturally felt right to do next. A walk in the late afternoon with beautiful sunlight over the vines, chatting to a friend then listening to my audio book, and then playing Get Over It on Liam's computer - a repetitive game that I'm very slowly getting better at and that I found soothing rather than frustrating.  Tony has cooked dinner so I'm about to curl up and eat and then watch the rest of Eclipse with the girls. I haven't looked at the news and spent little time on Facebook and on the whole I'm feeling more positive about everything.

Feeling Content

I've been feeling really good lately. Very happy with the way we're doing things, really thrilled that this is the lifestyle we are choosing every day. That's not to say that my anxiety doesn't pop up at all, or that I'm in a good mood all the time, but lately those lower moments have really only been moments, and even through them I know that overall I am feeling content on a very deep level, so the frustration/anxiety doesn't take over completely.

I realised last week that we weren't getting much consecutive time at home - little bits each day, but I wanted a bigger chunk of time so that we could all re-energise a bit. Last weekend we had Saturday at home, then Caitlin was working at the Girl Guides stall at the Lilydale Show - Tony took the 3 kids to the Show for the day, and I had a day at home by myself, which was lovely. I did a lot of housework and organising, and was pretty tired by the end of the day, but my restlessness and feeling of frustration at never being home was all gone, which meant I was able to be more present for my kids and Tony all week.

They had a great time at the Show too, LiAM came racing in the door to show me his Minecraft showbag, with 3 books, lots of Minecraft stickers and a few other bits and pieces. He loves going to the Show (or the Fair, as he calls it) so much, and it was beautiful to witness his excitement as he told me all about it. Millie got a Pokemon showbag, with a backpack, carry bag, temporary tattoos, a hat and sunglasses, and Caitlin got - oh I can't remember the name - it's a picture of a monkey face, and she got a backpack, a make up bag and lots of stationery. Tony got a Bertie Beetle showbag to share with me which was quite exciting - I LOVE Bertie Beetle chocolates, and the only place I can get them is in show bags, so it's a less-than-once-a-year treat. (And they were great!) They went on the dodgem cars (Caitlin and LiAM drove their own cars for the first time - very exciting) and saw lots of animals and played some Sideshow Alley games. Caitlin had a ball at the Guides stall, chatting to people about Guides and helping them make little catapults out of cups and balloons.

During the week we managed a fair amount of time at home, and I can tell LiAM is really exhausted and needs more, because he is watching a lot of television - he usually needs several days of TV when he's quite worn out, and then he suddenly turns it off and plays a heap of really creative games. I love chatting to him when he's watching TV though, he notices holes in the plot or weird assumptions that the characters make, and he thinks a lot about what he would do in the situations the characters find themselves in, and really ponders the decisions that the characters do make. The girls join in on a lot of those conversations too - we've re-written (verbally) a lot of TV shows and movies in lots of different ways.

On Tuesday we went to Healesville Sanctuary with my parents and my sister and her son. A very fun day - and great to have extra adults there, I was able to spend most of my time with Millie, letting her go at her pace (which is often quite slow in terms of moving through the zoo - she wants to look at things in detail, or go back and look at things again, and stop and touch things, and have a little talk or play at any spot she finds interesting - I love being able to go with her on her intricate journey through a place, which is sometimes too tricky when it's just me and the 3 kids, as the others want to move on more quickly).

At home this week we have played lots of games - the Penguin game (like Trouble or Headache, but with penguins, and you can drop your opponent's penguins into the ice which can be fun), Headbanz (like Celebrity Head), games with Millie's soft toys, Skylanders, Pokemon battles, lego, games under the hose, on the trampoline, Barbies, adding and subtracting games, Minecraft, and other iPad and computer games. We've been to the library and the op shop, and had a great afternoon at Homeschool Group, where Caitlin showed everyone how to make the catapults from the Show, 2 different types, and the kids were able to propel little fluffy pompoms all over the room. Caitlin has been practicing cursive writing, and we've been trying to clear out half of the dining room so we can convert it into a small bedroom for Caitlin - a work in progress, but we're slowly getting there.

Caitlin had her first acting performance for the season last night, Tony took her in and watched the show, she came home so pumped and excited, with her stage make up still on and so keen to get back there next Friday so I can see it as well. I'm looking forward to it - she's in a militia scene and has camouflage paint on her face, and is dressed in army gear - she loves it and I know it's a very powerful scene.